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Rosalind H. Williams
Remarks at the Music Library Dedication
December 4, 1996
My
purpose here today is to tell you something about my grandmother,
but I have to begin by acknowledging that it feels odd to be speaking
so publicly about such a private person. My grandmother was intensely
interested in individuals, but she shied away from society, in the
sense that Jane Austen would have used the term. She herself would
not have looked forward to this event.
Nevertheless,
we are justified, even obligated, to gather today in this very
public setting. We are celebrating not so much Rosalind Denny
Kenway Lewis, but even more the power of love and of memory.
Only a few of us here knew her as Grandma Lewis, as Aunt Ros,
as Mom; but all of us here are deeply shaped by similar relationships,
so that at some point it is impossible to know where individuality
ends and family begins. I once told my mother that when I found
myself getting stressed and cranky, I would think of Grandma
Lewis and try to assume some of her sweetness and gentleness.
My mother replied, "I do just the
same thing. I try to become my mother."
On
her mother's side, Rosalind Lewis was descended from an old and
respectable, though not especially wealthy, Boston family. Rosalind's
mother grew up on Beacon Hill, where she coasted down Chestnut Street
in the winter, and in the summer built nests in the hay on the Common.
Her father was an immigrant from Wales, an architect who collected
the works of John Ruskin and developed a thriving practice in the
Boston area. He died young, however, leaving five small children,
one of whom died of diphtheria shortly after. To make ends meet,
my grandmother's mother took boarders into her home in Newton. One
of them was a high school friend of her oldest son, a kid off the
farm who had come to Newton High to get a better education than
he could in the one-room schoolhouse in Laurel, Delaware. The boarder
was Warren Lewis, and the rest, as they say, is history, the history
of the heart that resulted in an exceptionally long and happy marriage.
Before
marrying, however, they both went to college -- Warren to MIT, and
Rosalind to Radcliffe, at a time when college education for women
was by no means commonplace (there were only 27 in her graduating
class). My grandmother never forgot that Radcliffe made college
possible for her by giving her a scholarship. She graduated in 1908,
cum laude, a classics major.
In
her married life, Rosalind Lewis kept her fine intelligence sharp
through lifelong habits of reading and writing. As a member of
the Social Science Club of Newton, she wrote and presented impressively
researched, thoughtful papers on such diverse topics as Nobel
Prize winners in literature, mental illness, and race relations
in the United States. But you mainly noticed her intelligence
in much more informal ways, in her powers of observation and
her sometimes cutting wit. She was an avid people-watcher, for
example; one time, when we were walking down a London street
together, she leaned over and whispered, "And some people say that Dickens exaggerates!" A Radcliffe
classmate of hers once complimented her on the fact that her namesake
daughter -- my mother -- had done so well at Newton High, my grandmother
responded, "I wonder if she is much brighter than I, or maybe the
school is slipping?"
In
the Newton world of my grandmother, music, like reading and writing,
was an ordinary part of ordinary life. Her children all took
piano lessons, starting in the third grade. She spent months
searching for an affordable instrument, enlisting the aid of
the children's piano teacher, Mrs. Hadden, before settling on
the Chickering upright that now rests in my living room. When
the children grew older, they took their music lessons from Virginia,
the most musically talented of the Kenway cousins. In a small
packet of special papers, my grandmother saved a recital program
of Mrs. Hadden's students in 1926 -- three of the thirteen performers
were Lewis children -- and another program from one of Virginia's
recitals in 1936, featuring Mary Lewis and concluding with a
rondo by the "Kenway
trio."
What
was most remarkable about Rosalind Lewis, however, was the greater
harmony of her soul. She loved people. This love expressed itself
in charitable activities, especially ones involving local children's
hospitals, but mostly it was expressed in daily interactions
with individuals. During World War II, she and Doc Lewis parented
two English children sent across the Atlantic to escape the Blitz.
Much later, when she was well into her seventies, she would take "the
old ladies of the church" [her words!] out for drives to view the
autumn foliage. While she rarely if ever entertained her husband's
faculty colleagues, she often welcomed his students, especially
ones from abroad. They would often be asked to share the bountiful
Sunday dinners, which featured enormous roasts and ended with quarts
of ice cream from the Brigham's in Newtonville slowly melting on
large platters during after-dinner conversation.
Most
of all, Rosalind Lewis lavished love on her own family. She was
the perfect grandmother. She cared for you as a unique individual.
She listened to you. She wrote you letters. She spoiled you. She
took you to Brigham's to get your favorite flavor of ice cream.
She knew my weakness for cashews and would regularly send me boxes
of them from Bailey's. When I was in college, she would still take
me shopping at Chestnut Hill. She would call me by an affectionate
childhood nickname, which I won't reveal here.
Being
spoiled is the antithesis of MIT culture. This is a place of unrelenting
demands, of rigor, discipline, and long, long-deferred gratification.
MIT never will and never should lose these qualities, but it should
also never lose sight of the fact that achievement untimately depends
on more. The rudder of discipline is useless unless the winds of
energy and enthusiasm fill the sails. Everyone at MIT has a soul
as well as a mind, passions as well as ideas, a past as well as
a future, a family as well as individuality. Intellectual excellence
requires courage and confidence, and these usually come from knowing
that someone believes in you, cares for you, loves you.
According
to a recent article in The Tech, some MIT students come to the Lewis
Music Library even if they have no music classes or assignments,
simply because they like being there. This doesn't surprise me.
There are few places on this campus that are so welcoming, nurturing,
embracing.
At
the conclusion of his first inaugural address, Abraham Lincoln
appealed to "the mystic chords of memory" that bind the dead
with the living. That is chords spelled with an h: not shackles
that tie, but vibrations that resonate. This is what we celebrate
today: the harmony of this place, of music, of a life well lived.
My grandmother's spirit dwells here.
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